it’s time to be civil (19)


# 10. Respect others’ opinions. … follow good protocols of disagreement. If possible and appropriate:

* Save the core of someone else’s opinion even as you qualify your acceptance: “Yes, I agree that what you say may be true in general, but there are circumstances when …”

* Recognize that although you don’t agree, what you hear is not unreasonable. “Indeed, that idea can be appealing; however …”

* Allow that if you knew more, your opinion might change: “I don;t know, it doesn’t seem right, but perhaps there is more here than meets the eye.”

* Make generous use of the metaphor of perspective. “Yes, but if you look at it from a different point of view …”

Choosing Civility: The Twenty-Five Rules of Considerate Conduct by P.M. Forni (St. Martin’s Press, 2002); p. 78

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