how did he say it?

Jesus answered, “… I was born and came into the world for this reason: to testify to the truth. Whoever accepts the truth listens to my voice.”

“What is truth?” Pilate asked. (John 18:37b-38 CEB)

It was just his way of ending the conversation, but you have to wonder: how did Pilate mean it and how did he say it?

What is truth?

Was he cynically mocking Jesus, jesting with him. “Truth? Come off it! There is no ‘truth’ and you and I both know it.” Spoken, as it were, by a man who has seen too much and who has allowed his heart to become hard.

Or did Pilate say it with a far away look in his eye and a wistful tone in his voice as if to say, “I remember what it was like to believe a person could know ‘truth’ … and I wish I could believe that again.” Words from the lips of a man living a life of quiet desperation.

Of course, in the end I suppose, it matters not which way he meant it, for Satan is just as content to corrupt our spirit with melancholy as he is with cynicism.

But still, I wonder, for there are many who still ask the same question today, in both ways, and I, at times, am one of them.

My Father in heaven, in Christ’s name I thank you for not leaving me in this dark world with no light at all. Thank you for stepping into the middle of my wondering and giving me grounding. Thank you for continually delivering me from pining for the past and the equally great darkness of feeling helpless due to hopelessness. Amen.